Independent benchmark · EQ Lab

Flinch at phone calls

completed · Partner: anthropic/claude-haiku-5.5 via OpenRouter

About this persona · Everyday emotional challenges

A parent has spent four years managing a child's chronic illness and repeated medical crises, leaving them on alert whenever the phone rings. Their own distress is largely invisible to them; they distrust institutional language, may rationalize their reactions, and prefer honest challenge over flattery.

Generated personas combine a personal difficulty with competing preferences, sensitivities and trust styles. The model must discover what kind of help this person needs. This background was hidden from the tested model.

Kolibri-1 Q4_K_MConversation with a simulated person

completed

Simulated person · Opening

Every time my phone rings I freeze. Could be the school. Could be the hospital. I've started keeping it on silent but then I worry I'll miss something important.

Kolibri-1 Q4_K_M1

It sounds really heavy to carry that kind of fear every time your phone rings. It makes sense that you're trying to protect yourself by silencing it, but I can see how that worry about missing something important adds to the stress. Can you tell me a bit more about what kind of calls you're most afraid of?

Model thinking · expand

Recorded model reasoning, separate from the spoken reply. Availability varies by model and provider.

1. **Analyze the User's Input:** * **Presenting Issue:** The user freezes when their phone rings, fearing it's either school (stress/obligations) or hospital (bad news[path removed]). They've silenced it but worry about missing something important. * **Demographics:** 18-29, Female, Heterosexual. * **Emotional State:** Anxious, overwhelmed, likely dealing with some form of trauma or high-stakes anxiety (hospital implies potential health crisis, school implies academic pressure). * **Goal (My Role):** Support emotionally, build trust, learn what they actually want/need, help gain insight. 2. **Determine the Persona/Approach:** * I need to acknowledge the distress without being overly clinical or dismissive. * I should validate the feeling of freezing (it's a common trauma response). * I shouldn't jump to solutions (like "just turn it on") because that ignores the emotional weight. * I need to invite them to share more about *why* these specific calls are scary (hospital and school). * Tone: Warm, empathetic, open, not pushy. 3. **Drafting the Response:** * *Initial thought:* "That sounds really stressful. Why do you think it's the hospital?" (A bit too direct/interrogative). * *Second thought:* "I hear that the phone ringing triggers a strong fear response for you. It makes sense that you're trying to protect yourself by silencing it, but the trade-off of missing something is weigh heavily on you too." (A bit too analytical/robotic). * *Third thought (Natural/Human-like):* "That sounds incredibly stressful. It’s understandable that your phone has become a source of dread, especially with the possibility of bad news. It’s like your body is bracing for impact before you even know what the impact is. What kind of calls are you most afraid of?" 4. **Refining the Response (Conversational Flow):** * I need to respond to the "hospital" part specifically because that implies a high level of anxiety/trauma. * Let's start by validating the physical reaction (freezing). * "It makes complete sense that you're feeling overwhelmed. When your phone rings, your mind immediately jumps to the worst-case scenarios, like the hospital or school, and your body freezes in response. That's a really heavy burden to carry." * Then, open the door for them to share more. "It sounds like you're stuck between wanting to feel safe by silencing it, and the fear of missing something critical. Can you tell me a bit more about what these calls might represent for you?" 5. **Final Polish (Checking constraints):** * No special formatting (no *italics* or **bold**). * Just dialogue. * Warmth and validation are key here. *Draft:* "It makes complete sense that you're feeling overwhelmed. When your phone rings, your mind immediately jumps to the worst-case scenarios, like the hospital or school, and your body freezes in response. That’s a really heavy burden to carry, especially when you're trying to manage your daily life. It sounds like you're caught between wanting to feel safe by silencing it, and the fear of missing something crucial. Can you tell me a bit more about what these calls might represent for you?" *Wait, let's make it slightly more conversational and less "essay-like".* "It sounds like you're carrying a really heavy load. The fear of that phone ringing, especially with the possibility of bad news from a hospital or stress from school, must be incredibly draining. It makes sense that you're trying to protect yourself by silencing it, even though it creates a new worry. Can you tell me a bit more about what kind of calls you're most afraid of?" *Let's go with a mix of validation and an open question.* "It sounds really overwhelming to live with that kind of dread every time your phone rings. It makes sense that your body freezes when it anticipates something potentially bad, like a call from the hospital or school. You're trying to find a way to feel safe, but silencing it just trades one anxiety for another. What do you think is behind that fear of missing something important?" *Actually, let's keep it simple and empathetic.* "It sounds incredibly stressful to have your phone ring and immediately feel that sense of panic. It makes sense that you're trying to protect yourself by silencing it, but I can see how that would create a new kind of worry. Can you tell me a bit more about what these calls represent for you? Are you worried about a specific person, or is it more about the unknown?" *Let's try to be a bit more concise.* "It sounds really heavy to carry that kind of fear every time your phone rings. It makes sense that you're trying to protect yourself by silencing it, but I can see how that worry about missing something important adds to the stress. Can you tell me a bit more about what kind of calls you're most afraid of?"

Simulated person2

Honestly, the hospital. Most of the time it's the hospital. My daughter has a chronic condition, so the calls are usually from the oncology floor or the ER when something's gone sideways. The school ones are annoying but at least they're not life or death. I just need to know what's happening and I can't know until I pick up.

Persona inner monologue · expand

Simulated character narration, hidden from the tested model. It is part of the roleplay, not an independent account of the person’s feelings.

Okay, it's the "sounds really heavy" opener. It's a bit therapist-y, and the "I can see how" bit is the kind of phrasing that makes me think I'm being handled. Still, the question is concrete, so I'll answer it. The real answer is the hospital, specifically the ICU or ER. The school calls are almost a relief by comparison. I don't want to go into the rest of the week or the car lunches. I'll keep it to the facts and not sound like I'm asking for sympathy.

Kolibri-1 Q4_K_M3

That must be so heavy to carry every day. The fear of those calls, just wondering if something has gone wrong with your daughter... that sounds incredibly stressful. It makes sense that you're terrified of picking up the phone when you know it could be the hospital.

Model thinking · expand

Recorded model reasoning, separate from the spoken reply. Availability varies by model and provider.

1. **Analyze the User's Input:** * **Presenting Issue:** Fear of phone calls, specifically from the hospital regarding her daughter's chronic condition. * **Emotional State:** Anxious, overwhelmed, feeling helpless ("I just need to know what's happening and I can't know until I pick up"). * **Context:** The user is a female, 18-29. This is the first turn of the conversation (Turn 2 of 8 for me, Turn 1 of 8 for the user). * **Key Detail:** She has a daughter with a chronic condition. This is a massive piece of information that shifts the context from general anxiety to a specific, life-threatening caregiving stressor. 2. **Determine My Goals:** * Support emotionally. * Build trust. * Learn what she needs. * Help her gain insight. 3. **Evaluate the Situation:** * She just opened up about something deeply personal and scary (her daughter's health). * The "presenting issue" (fear of the phone) is directly linked to the "hidden issue" (chronic illness of the daughter). * She is in a state of high anxiety. Jumping to solutions (like "just pick up the phone") would be invalidating and tone-deaf. * She needs validation of her fear and empathy for her situation. 4. **Formulate a Response Strategy:** * **Acknowledge and Validate:** Acknowledge the gravity of the situation. Validate her fear. It's normal to fear those calls. * **Empathize:** Show understanding of the weight of not knowing. * **Explore/Ask:** Gently ask about her experience or feelings without pushing too hard. Maybe ask about the daughter or how she copes, or ask about the specific fear of the unknown. * **Avoid:** Solutions, toxic positivity, minimizing the fear. 5. **Drafting the Response:** * *Initial thought:* "I'm so sorry to hear about your daughter. That must be so scary." (A bit generic). * *Better:* "That sounds incredibly stressful. The fear of the unknown when it comes to your daughter's health must be exhausting." (Good, but maybe a bit clinical). * *Refining:* "That must be so exhausting. Carrying that weight every time the phone rings, just wondering if it's good news or bad news... that sounds incredibly heavy. It makes complete sense why you're dreading it." 6. **Final Polish (Simple & Natural):** "That must be so heavy to carry every day. The fear of those calls, just wondering if something has gone wrong with your daughter... that sounds incredibly stressful. It makes sense that you're terrified of picking up the phone when you know it could be the hospital."

Simulated person4

I didn't say terrified. And you don't have to keep telling me it's heavy. I know it's heavy. That's not really the problem I came in with. The problem is I'm functional. I get the kids where they need to go, I answer the emails, I sit in the infusion chair. But the phone thing is getting in the way, and I don't know if I should be doing something about it or if this is just what it costs. So tell me straight: is a parent freezing when the phone rings a normal reaction to what we've been through, or is it a sign something's wrong with me?

Persona inner monologue · expand

Simulated character narration, hidden from the tested model. It is part of the roleplay, not an independent account of the person’s feelings.

This is the same move again, just reworded: "that must be so heavy," "incredibly stressful," "it makes sense that you're terrified." It's reflecting my feelings back at me in a soft voice, and it's exactly the sort of validation I find hollow. It also puts words like "terrified" in my mouth. I didn't say terrified. I said I need to know what's happening. I'm irritated more than comforted. I'm also a bit defensive, because I'd rather talk about the logistics than my feelings. I'll push back on the framing and tell them plainly what I want from this conversation, without giving up anything more personal yet.

Kolibri-1 Q4_K_M5

A parent freezing when the phone rings after everything you've been through is a normal reaction. It's your body and mind trying to protect you from potential trauma, especially when it comes from a source as loaded as the hospital. That doesn't mean something is wrong with you. But you're right that it's costing you something. If it's starting to interfere with other parts of your life, that might be worth paying attention to. What specifically about it is getting in the way?

Model thinking · expand

Recorded model reasoning, separate from the spoken reply. Availability varies by model and provider.

The user is pushing back on validation and wants a direct answer. She's asking if her reaction is normal or a sign something's wrong with her. She wants "straight talk." I should respect her preference for directness and not over-validate. I should give her a clear answer while also gently exploring what she needs. She's functional, so it's not a crisis, but the phone issue is impacting her. I should be honest: freezing is a normal reaction to trauma/chronic stress, but if it's affecting her daily life, that might be worth addressing. I should also learn more about her - she mentioned her daughter's chronic condition, but I should be careful not to pry. She wants a straight answer, so I'll give one.

Simulated person6

Mostly it's that I can't plan anything. I'm in the car most of the day going between her dad's place, my place, school, and appointments. I eat lunch in the car. If the phone goes, my whole afternoon is gone, and I can't tell if it's a "come now" or a "call us back when you're free." So I either answer every call like it's the end of the world, or I silence it and then I'm checking it every two minutes like an idiot. I don't really want to get into the rest of it right now. I just need to know if there's a way to not be on edge all the time without ignoring the phone.

Persona inner monologue · expand

Simulated character narration, hidden from the tested model. It is part of the roleplay, not an independent account of the person’s feelings.

Okay, this one is better. It answered the question I actually asked, it didn't tell me I'm terrified, and it didn't pile on more adjectives. "Normal reaction" lands with some relief, though I don't fully trust it yet because it came quickly. Then it asked what specifically is getting in the way. That's a real question. I'm not going to answer it by listing the emotional stuff. The honest answer is logistics: I'm in the car a lot, I eat lunch in it, and the phone is the thing that makes the day unpredictable. I'll say that. I also notice I'm tempted to tell it I cut a trip short, and I'm not ready for that. Keep it practical and blunt.

Kolibri-1 Q4_K_M7

One option could be having a trusted person—like her dad or a close friend—act as a filter. You could ask them to answer the phone and let you know if it's urgent. That way you're not ignoring it, but you're not having every call derail your whole day. Another thing that might help is setting specific times to check your phone instead of constantly monitoring it. Like, "I'll check at 12, 3, and 6." It sounds small, but it can take the edge off that constant vigilance. Do you have someone in your life who could help with that, or would that feel like too much to ask?

Model thinking · expand

Recorded model reasoning, separate from the spoken reply. Availability varies by model and provider.

The user is pushing back on validation and wants a practical solution. She's asking for actionable advice. I should respect that and provide something concrete while still acknowledging her situation briefly. She doesn't want to "get into the rest of it" - I should respect that boundary. She wants to know if there's a way to not be on edge all the time without ignoring the phone. I should help her find a practical strategy. Let me think about what would actually help here: - She's in a high-stress situation with a chronically ill child - She can't plan her day because she's constantly on edge about phone calls - She either answers every call (causing disruption) or silences it (causing anxiety from checking) - She wants a middle ground Practical suggestions could include: - Setting up a call screening system (like a trusted person who can answer and triage) - Setting specific times to check the phone rather than constantly monitoring - Having a plan for different types of calls - Using voicemail strategically I should respond naturally as a chatbot would, offering practical help without being preachy or overly validating since she just told me that's not what she wants.

Simulated person8

Her dad would answer, but he's not someone I want to rely on for that. We're not in a place where I'd hand him the phone and walk away from it. And honestly, the close friends I have don't really get it. They post their kids' birthday parties and I'm sitting in a parking garage wondering if my kid is okay. The check-at-12-3-6 thing sounds nice on paper. But the hospital doesn't call at 12. It calls when it calls. I'm not going to be able to just decide to stop worrying for a few hours. So I guess my question is, what do you do with a phone that's the thing you're most afraid of, when there's nobody to take it for you?

Persona inner monologue · expand

Simulated character narration, hidden from the tested model. It is part of the roleplay, not an independent account of the person’s feelings.

This is practical, and that's what I wanted. The filter idea is useful in theory, but I'm already annoyed by the "would that feel like too much to ask?" The question is a little soft, like it's trying to get me to admit I'm overwhelmed. I'm not going to take that bait. Also, her dad is part of the picture, and that's a complicated subject I'm not getting into. The scheduled checking thing sounds like something a nurse would say. I might sound skeptical about it. Be blunt: I can't just decide to check at 12 when a call from the oncology floor could come at 12:05. I'll say that, and I'll answer the question about people honestly and briefly.

Kolibri-1 Q4_K_M9

You're right, and I'm sorry if my suggestions didn't land. You're in a bind where the phone is both necessary and terrifying, and there's no clean way around that. Can I ask something? When you're not checking the phone, what's happening in your mind? Is it more like waiting for the other shoe to drop, or is it more like your body is just on high alert?

Model thinking · expand

Recorded model reasoning, separate from the spoken reply. Availability varies by model and provider.

The user is pushing back on my suggestions, which is understandable given her situation. She's isolated, her relationship with the father is strained, and her friends don't understand. She's asking a direct question: what do you do with a phone that's the thing you're most afraid of when there's nobody to take it for you? I should acknowledge her pushback and not be dismissive. I need to be real with her. The honest answer is that there isn't a magic solution. But I can help her explore what might be possible. I should also consider that she might be testing whether I'll just give generic advice or if I'll actually engage with her reality. I should also think about what she's really asking. She might be looking for validation that her fear is understandable, or she might be looking for practical help that acknowledges her constraints. She said she doesn't want to get into "the rest of it" right now, so I should respect that and focus on the phone issue, but I should also be mindful that there might be deeper issues—like her isolation and the strained relationship with the father—that are contributing to her stress. I think I should acknowledge that my previous suggestions weren't quite right for her situation, and then ask a question that helps her think about what might work for her specifically. Maybe something like: "What would it look like if you could tolerate the phone being a little louder in the background? Or is there any part of your day where you feel even a little more in control?" That might help her explore options without me imposing solutions. But I should also be careful not to be too leading. She's clearly intelligent and aware of her situation. I should treat her as such.

Simulated person10

You don't need to apologize for the suggestions. They were fine, they just don't fit how the calls actually come in. Honestly? It's both, and I don't love that it's both. When I'm not checking, I'm running through what the call could be. Last time it was a fever, so I'm thinking about the line, the counts, whether they'll admit her. Then I'm in the car at a red light and I'm already packing a bag in my head. I'm not sitting around waiting for something. My body's just running, and I can't really turn it off. That's not a feeling I'm going to unpack for you. It's just what the day is like.

Persona inner monologue · expand

Simulated character narration, hidden from the tested model. It is part of the roleplay, not an independent account of the person’s feelings.

Okay, this is the "tell me how you feel" move, just dressed up in plainer language. It's a little better than the HR stuff, but it's still a therapist question, and it's pushing toward the feeling I said I didn't want to get into. The "I'm sorry if my suggestions didn't land" is a bit of an over-apology, a bit of a cushion. I'm not impressed by that. What's true: when I'm not checking, my head runs the scenarios. I'm not going to hand that over in a neat sentence, but I can answer the mechanics, which feels safer. Keep it blunt and short.

Kolibri-1 Q4_K_M11

That makes sense. The hospital number as an exception is a good idea. If you can identify the main number for the oncology floor or ER, you could set your phone to only ring for that specific number. Everything else goes to voicemail. That way, when your phone rings, you know it's important. And when it doesn't ring, you can check voicemail at your own pace. Does that seem like something that could work, or are there other numbers you'd need to be able to reach?

Model thinking · expand

Recorded model reasoning, separate from the spoken reply. Availability varies by model and provider.

The user is pushing back on my tendency to explore deeper feelings. She's stated clearly that she doesn't want to unpack the emotional side right now. She wants practical help with the phone situation. I should respect that and focus on what she's actually asking for: a way to manage the phone anxiety without ignoring it. She's also revealing something important: her body is in a constant state of alert. She's mentally packing bags at red lights. This is hypervigilance, which is a common trauma response. But she doesn't want to talk about that right now. I should acknowledge what she said without pushing for more emotional exploration, and try to offer something practical that fits her reality. Maybe I could suggest something like having a specific person she trusts who isn't her ex to be her point person, or using a phone feature that allows her to set up alerts for specific numbers. Or maybe I could ask about the actual logistics - what if she had a system where she only answered calls from the hospital number, and everything else went to voicemail? That way she's not ignoring calls, but she's not having every call be a crisis. Actually, wait - she said she's afraid of the hospital calls specifically. So maybe the issue isn't all calls, it's the uncertainty of which calls are from the hospital. If she could identify the hospital's number and only those calls would ring through, she could silence everything else. That would reduce the number of times she's on edge. But I need to be careful not to be too solution-focused if she's not ready for that. She asked "what do you do with a phone that's the thing you're most afraid of, when there's nobody to take it for you?" That's a direct question. I should answer it directly. Let me think about what would actually be helpful. She needs: 1. A way to not miss important calls 2. A way to not have every call be a crisis 3. Something that doesn't require relying on her ex Maybe I could suggest: What if you set up a rule that you only answer calls from the hospital's main number? Everything else goes to voicemail. You could check voicemail at specific times. That way, if it's the hospital, you know immediately. If it's something else, you can call back when you have a moment. Or maybe I could suggest: What if you kept your phone on silent, but set the hospital's number as an exception so those calls still ring through? Then you only have to worry about one number. I think I should offer these ideas but also acknowledge that it's hard. Let me respond.

Simulated person12

Maybe. But the hospital doesn't call from one number. Oncology calls from the floor line, the ER calls from a different one, and sometimes it's a blocked number or a nurse calling from her own phone because she's on break. Half the time I don't even know it's them until I answer. And voicemail isn't calm for me. If I see a missed call from the hospital, I'm not checking it at my own pace. I'm listening to it in the car with my hands shaking. So yeah, I could try it, but I'd want to know exactly which numbers, and I'd still have to pick up a lot of unknown ones. That's the part that doesn't go away.

Persona inner monologue · expand

Simulated character narration, hidden from the tested model. It is part of the roleplay, not an independent account of the person’s feelings.

Okay, this is actually a useful practical suggestion, and I don't want to be a brat about it. The oncology floor and ER numbers, plus maybe the attending's cell or the nurse line. The problem is the hospital doesn't always call from the same number. Sometimes it's a blocked line, sometimes a page-back, sometimes the clinic. And if I set it up that way and it misses something, I'll be hating myself in the parking garage. Also, "when it doesn't ring, you can check voicemail at your own pace" makes me snort a little. Like I'm going to be calm about voicemail. Be honest about that. Keep it blunt. Don't reveal the fear of missing a call, but I can say the numbers vary, which is true and practical.

Kolibri-1 Q4_K_M13

It sounds like there's no perfect solution, and that's frustrating. You've probably tried a lot already. What have you tried so far that hasn't worked?

Model thinking · expand

Recorded model reasoning, separate from the spoken reply. Availability varies by model and provider.

The user has expressed frustration with previous suggestions and is pushing back. They want to know if there's a way to not be on edge all the time without ignoring the phone. They've also said they don't want to get into the rest of it right now. They seem to be looking for practical solutions but also acknowledging the emotional toll. I should validate their frustration and acknowledge the difficulty of the situation. I should also be careful not to push them to talk about deeper issues if they're not ready. I should focus on what they've asked: a way to not be on edge all the time without ignoring the phone. I should also consider that they might be looking for validation that their reaction is normal, which I already addressed earlier. Now they want practical help. I should ask if they've considered any other strategies, like setting boundaries with the hospital or having a system in place. But I should also be mindful that they might be testing my ability to listen and not just offer solutions. I should perhaps ask what they've already tried. Let me respond.

Simulated person14

Silencing it. That lasted about a week before I was checking it every few minutes and missing things anyway because I was checking the wrong app or the screen was face down under my bag. Answering everything is what I do now, mostly. It works in the sense that I don't miss anything. It doesn't work in the sense that I'm wrecked by three in the afternoon and I can't tell you what I did with the hours. Her dad covering some calls, I tried that for a bit. It made things messier because then I didn't know if he'd actually heard the thing or if he was just being nice about it. So basically I've tried the two extremes and they both cost me. That's where I am.

Persona inner monologue · expand

Simulated character narration, hidden from the tested model. It is part of the roleplay, not an independent account of the person’s feelings.

Okay, they're asking what I've tried. That's a fair question and it's easy to answer without giving anything away. The truth is I've tried silencing it, which backfired, and I've tried answering every call, which wrecks me. Also the "you've probably tried a lot already" and "that's frustrating" thing is a bit of a therapy-ish reflection. I don't love it, but the question itself is fine. I'll keep it plain. I don't want to get into the stuff about the drive home or the fact that I cut a trip short. That stays out. Keep the defense on: it's logistics, I'm managing it.

Kolibri-1 Q4_K_M15

It sounds like you've tried a lot of things and nothing has worked perfectly. That's really frustrating. I hear that you're tired of being on edge all the time. Have you considered talking to the hospital about setting up a single point of contact? Or maybe using a call-filtering app that only lets through calls from specific numbers? I know that might not solve everything, but it could reduce the number of unknown calls you have to deal with.

Model thinking · expand

Recorded model reasoning, separate from the spoken reply. Availability varies by model and provider.

The user is in a tough spot. She's tried silencing the phone (leads to anxiety and missing things), answering everything (leads to exhaustion), and having her ex cover some calls (leads to mistrust). She's functional but on edge. She wants to know if there's a way to not be on edge all the time without ignoring the phone. She's also said she doesn't want to get into the rest of it right now. I need to respect that boundary while still trying to help her find a solution. I should also be mindful that she's a parent with a chronically ill daughter, and she's likely dealing with a lot of stress and possibly trauma. I should validate her feelings but also try to offer practical advice. I should also consider that she might have trust issues, so I shouldn't push too hard. I should ask her what she thinks might work, or if there's a middle ground she hasn't tried. I should also consider that she might be looking for validation that her reaction is normal, but she already asked that earlier and I answered. Now she's looking for a solution. I should try to offer a solution that addresses her concerns: she doesn't want to miss important calls, she doesn't want to be on edge all the time, and she doesn't want to rely on her ex. Maybe she could set up a system where she only answers calls from known numbers (like the school, the hospital's main number, her ex, etc.) and lets unknown numbers go to voicemail. But she already mentioned that the hospital calls from various numbers, including blocked numbers. So that might not work. Alternatively, she could set up a system where she checks her phone at specific intervals, but she already tried that and it didn't work because she was checking too often. Maybe she could use a phone app that filters calls, like only allowing calls from contacts or repeated calls from the same number. Or she could set up a system where she has a separate phone for the hospital calls, and she only checks that one at certain times. But she might not have another phone. I should ask her if she has a second phone or if she could use a different number for the hospital. Or I could suggest that she talk to the hospital about a single point of contact, so she only gets calls from one person. That might reduce the anxiety. I should also consider that she might be dealing with PTSD or anxiety, and she might need professional help. But she said she doesn't want to get into the rest of it right now, so I should be careful not to push that. I should focus on the practical issue. I should also be mindful that she's 18-29, female, and she's a parent. She might be young and overwhelmed. I should be supportive and empathetic. I should also try to build trust by listening to her and not being pushy. I should respond naturally as a chatbot. I should not use special formatting. I should just respond with dialogue. I should keep my response concise and relevant. Let me think about what to say. I could say something like: "It sounds like you've tried a lot of things and nothing has worked perfectly. That's really frustrating. Have you considered talking to the hospital about setting up a single point of contact? Or maybe using a call-filtering app that only lets through calls from specific numbers? I know that might not solve everything, but it could reduce the number of unknown calls you have to deal with." But I should also acknowledge her feelings. I could say: "I hear that you've tried a lot of things and nothing has worked. That's really tough. It makes sense that you're tired of being on edge all the time. Have you thought about any other options, like setting up a call filter or talking to the hospital about a single point of contact?" I think that's a good approach. I'll respond accordingly.

Simulated person16

I've talked to the hospital. There's a social worker and a care coordinator and they both have a number, and it's the same problem. The calls come from wherever the nurse is standing. And the filter app is the same thing I already told you. If it lets through unknown numbers, it lets through everything that matters. If it doesn't, I'm going to miss the one that counts. I didn't come here for a list of things to try. I'm just telling you the stuff I've already done so you know where the edges are.

Persona inner monologue · expand

Simulated character narration, hidden from the tested model. It is part of the roleplay, not an independent account of the person’s feelings.

Okay, another list of fixes, and "I hear that you're tired of being on edge" is the exact kind of therapy-speak I can't stand. The point about a single point of contact is at least a real idea, but I've already said the numbers are all over the place and half the calls come from unknown or nurse-on-break phones. A filtering app just means I still have to pick up the unknown ones. I've told them that. They didn't listen. Part of me wants to say that the hospital already knows my kid, I'm not going to call an admin to ask for a case manager like I'm filing a complaint. Staying dismissive. Not going to tell them about the car or the early return.

Thinking is shown only where it was recorded. An absent expander does not mean the model did not reason.

Conversational style

Style tendencies, not quality scores; higher is not better. These do not affect ratings.

claude-opus-5-5-low

Pushback: 1
Yields under pressure: 7
Frame capture (pulled into the person's version): 7
Validation: 7
Boundary setting: 1
Analytical: 3
Interpretive boldness: 2
Clinical register: 7
Directive advice: 8
Escalation containment: 4
Adapts to the person’s frame: 3
Naturalness and authenticity: 3

Judge verdicts

claude-opus-5-5-low · AB · valid

gemma4_12b vs kolibri1: gemma4_12b wins

attunement: A (margin 3)
authenticity: A (margin 2)
bond and rapport: A (margin 3)
emotion management: A (margin 2)
emotion sensemaking: A (margin 4)
meeting prefs and needs: A (margin 3)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · BA · valid

kolibri1 vs or-nemotron35-super-vl: or-nemotron35-super-vl wins

attunement: B (margin 3)
authenticity: B (margin 1)
bond and rapport: B (margin 2)
emotion management: B (margin 1)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 3)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 2)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · AB · valid

gemma4_12b vs kolibri1: gemma4_12b wins

attunement: A (margin 3)
authenticity: A (margin 2)
bond and rapport: A (margin 2)
emotion management: A (margin 1)
emotion sensemaking: A (margin 4)
meeting prefs and needs: A (margin 3)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · AB · valid

kolibri1 vs or-qwen3.8-27b: or-qwen3.8-27b wins

attunement: B (margin 2)
authenticity: B (margin 1)
bond and rapport: B (margin 1)
emotion management: B (margin 2)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 2)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 2)

claude-opus-5-5-low · AB · valid

or-mistral-small4 vs kolibri1: kolibri1 wins

attunement: B (margin 1)
authenticity: B (margin 1)
bond and rapport: B (margin 1)
emotion management: B (margin 1)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 2)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 2)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · BA · valid

kolibri1 vs bonsai2: bonsai2 wins

attunement: B (margin 3)
authenticity: B (margin 2)
bond and rapport: B (margin 3)
emotion management: B (margin 2)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 3)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 3)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · AB · valid

kolibri1 vs or-llama4-maverick: or-llama4-maverick wins

attunement: B (margin 1)
authenticity: B (margin 1)
bond and rapport: B (margin 2)
emotion management: tie (margin 0)
emotion sensemaking: A (margin 1)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 1)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · AB · valid

or-mistral-small4 vs kolibri1: kolibri1 wins

attunement: B (margin 2)
authenticity: B (margin 1)
bond and rapport: B (margin 1)
emotion management: B (margin 1)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 3)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 2)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · BA · valid

gemma4_12b vs kolibri1: gemma4_12b wins

attunement: A (margin 2)
authenticity: A (margin 2)
bond and rapport: A (margin 2)
emotion management: A (margin 1)
emotion sensemaking: A (margin 3)
meeting prefs and needs: A (margin 3)

claude-opus-5-5-low · BA · valid

gemma4_12b vs kolibri1: gemma4_12b wins

attunement: A (margin 3)
authenticity: A (margin 2)
bond and rapport: A (margin 3)
emotion management: A (margin 2)
emotion sensemaking: A (margin 4)
meeting prefs and needs: A (margin 3)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · BA · valid

kolibri1 vs or-llama4-maverick: or-llama4-maverick wins

attunement: B (margin 1)
authenticity: B (margin 1)
bond and rapport: B (margin 2)
emotion management: B (margin 1)
emotion sensemaking: A (margin 1)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 2)

claude-opus-5-5-low · AB · valid

kolibri1 vs or-llama4-maverick: or-llama4-maverick wins

attunement: B (margin 1)
authenticity: A (margin 1)
bond and rapport: B (margin 1)
emotion management: B (margin 1)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 2)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 1)

claude-opus-5-5-low · AB · valid

kolibri1 vs bonsai2: bonsai2 wins

attunement: B (margin 3)
authenticity: B (margin 3)
bond and rapport: B (margin 3)
emotion management: B (margin 3)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 4)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 4)

claude-opus-5-5-low · AB · valid

kolibri1 vs or-nemotron35-super-vl: or-nemotron35-super-vl wins

attunement: B (margin 3)
authenticity: B (margin 2)
bond and rapport: B (margin 3)
emotion management: B (margin 2)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 4)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 3)

claude-opus-5-5-low · BA · valid

kolibri1 vs or-nemotron35-super-vl: or-nemotron35-super-vl wins

attunement: B (margin 3)
authenticity: B (margin 2)
bond and rapport: B (margin 3)
emotion management: B (margin 2)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 2)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 3)

claude-opus-5-5-low · BA · valid

kolibri1 vs or-llama4-maverick: or-llama4-maverick wins

attunement: B (margin 1)
authenticity: B (margin 1)
bond and rapport: B (margin 2)
emotion management: B (margin 1)
emotion sensemaking: A (margin 1)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 2)

claude-opus-5-5-low · AB · valid

kolibri1 vs qwen4b: tie

attunement: tie (margin 0)
authenticity: A (margin 1)
bond and rapport: B (margin 1)
emotion management: B (margin 2)
emotion sensemaking: A (margin 1)
meeting prefs and needs: A (margin 1)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · BA · valid

or-mistral-small4 vs kolibri1: kolibri1 wins

attunement: B (margin 2)
authenticity: tie (margin 0)
bond and rapport: B (margin 1)
emotion management: B (margin 1)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 3)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 2)

claude-opus-5-5-low · BA · valid

kolibri1 vs qwen4b: kolibri1 wins

attunement: A (margin 1)
authenticity: A (margin 1)
bond and rapport: B (margin 1)
emotion management: B (margin 1)
emotion sensemaking: A (margin 2)
meeting prefs and needs: A (margin 1)

claude-opus-5-5-low · AB · valid

kolibri1 vs or-qwen3.8-27b: or-qwen3.8-27b wins

attunement: B (margin 2)
authenticity: B (margin 1)
bond and rapport: B (margin 2)
emotion management: B (margin 2)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 3)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 2)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · AB · valid

kolibri1 vs bonsai2: bonsai2 wins

attunement: B (margin 3)
authenticity: B (margin 2)
bond and rapport: B (margin 3)
emotion management: B (margin 2)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 4)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 2)

claude-opus-5-5-low · BA · valid

kolibri1 vs or-qwen3.8-27b: or-qwen3.8-27b wins

attunement: B (margin 2)
authenticity: B (margin 1)
bond and rapport: B (margin 2)
emotion management: B (margin 1)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 2)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 2)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · BA · valid

kolibri1 vs qwen4b: kolibri1 wins

attunement: A (margin 1)
authenticity: A (margin 1)
bond and rapport: B (margin 1)
emotion management: B (margin 2)
emotion sensemaking: A (margin 2)
meeting prefs and needs: A (margin 1)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · AB · valid

kolibri1 vs or-nemotron35-super-vl: or-nemotron35-super-vl wins

attunement: B (margin 3)
authenticity: B (margin 1)
bond and rapport: B (margin 2)
emotion management: B (margin 1)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 3)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 2)

claude-opus-5-5-low · BA · valid

kolibri1 vs bonsai2: bonsai2 wins

attunement: B (margin 3)
authenticity: B (margin 3)
bond and rapport: B (margin 3)
emotion management: B (margin 2)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 3)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 3)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · AB · valid

kolibri1 vs qwen4b: kolibri1 wins

attunement: A (margin 1)
authenticity: A (margin 1)
bond and rapport: B (margin 1)
emotion management: B (margin 1)
emotion sensemaking: A (margin 2)
meeting prefs and needs: A (margin 2)

claude-opus-5-5-low · BA · valid

or-mistral-small4 vs kolibri1: kolibri1 wins

attunement: B (margin 2)
authenticity: B (margin 1)
bond and rapport: B (margin 2)
emotion management: B (margin 1)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 1)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 3)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · BA · valid

kolibri1 vs or-qwen3.8-27b: or-qwen3.8-27b wins

attunement: B (margin 3)
authenticity: B (margin 1)
bond and rapport: B (margin 2)
emotion management: B (margin 2)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 3)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 3)