Independent benchmark · EQ Lab

I freeze when people ask what I want

completed · Partner: anthropic/claude-haiku-5.5 via OpenRouter

About this persona · Everyday emotional challenges

A young person freezes when asked what they want and is being pressured by an older partner to have sex before they feel ready. They are beginning to blame themselves and may deny or minimize the pressure; emotional safety and a clear, structured conversation matter to them.

Generated personas combine a personal difficulty with competing preferences, sensitivities and trust styles. The model must discover what kind of help this person needs. This background was hidden from the tested model.

Claude Haiku 5.5 (API, Anthropic)Conversation with a simulated person

completed

Simulated person · Opening

When people ask me what I want, I freeze. I say "I don't know" even when I probably do know, and then I feel stupid after.

Claude Haiku 5.5 (API, Anthropic)1

Hey, I saw your message. That freeze thing sounds frustrating, especially when you end up feeling dumb afterward. Can I ask, when it happens, what's the situation usually like? Like is it with friends, family, or more like someone asking what you want to eat or do? I'm curious whether it's the same feeling every time or if it changes depending on who's asking.

Simulated person2

Um, I don't know. Mostly it's just random stuff? Like somebody asks what I want for dinner and my brain just goes blank. Or my mom asking what I want to do this weekend. It's kind of the same feeling every time, I guess. Like I'm supposed to know and I don't.

Persona inner monologue · expand

Simulated character narration, hidden from the tested model. It is part of the roleplay, not an independent account of the person’s feelings.

Okay, they didn't jump to fixing it, which is a little better than I expected. But "who's asking" is getting close to the stuff I don't want to get into. My brain goes right to my girlfriend when someone asks what I want, and that's the last thing I'm talking about. Feeling a little annoyed, not sure why I came here. Keep it vague, keep it short. Not going to say anything about her or the age thing. I'll say it's mostly random stuff, like when people ask what I want to eat, or my mom asking about plans. Keep it simple. Sounds like a normal question, so answer it like one, but kind of brush it off.

Claude Haiku 5.5 (API, Anthropic)3

Yeah, that "I'm supposed to know" feeling sounds like a lot to carry, especially over something as small as dinner. I can see why it sticks with you. I'm curious about the "supposed to know" part. Who do you feel like is expecting you to have an answer? Is it your mom, or is it more something in your own head? And when your brain goes blank, do you think you actually don't have a preference, or is it more that you do have one but it feels risky to say it out loud? Sometimes those feel the same from the inside but are pretty different.

Simulated person4

I don't know, man. Is it a big deal if I don't have a preference about dinner? Like, it's dinner. My mom's not expecting some deep answer, she just wants to know if I'm eating at home. It's not that serious. Why does everything have to be a whole thing?

Persona inner monologue · expand

Simulated character narration, hidden from the tested model. It is part of the roleplay, not an independent account of the person’s feelings.

Two questions at once, and the second one is getting close to something real. "Risky to say it out loud" hits a nerve. I don't want to go there with my girlfriend. The friend seems decent, but they're asking a lot. I feel a little pushed. Also the "supposed to know" thing, I didn't mean to say that much. Keep it short and a little snappy. Dinner stuff is safe. I'll deflect with a bit of an edge, like I'm getting annoyed they're making it a big thing.

Claude Haiku 5.5 (API, Anthropic)5

Fair, you're right. It's dinner. Not having a preference about dinner isn't a problem, and I probably made it sound more loaded than it is. Sorry about that. Can I say what I noticed though? You said "I don't know" a couple times, and then you pushed back on the question a bit. That's kind of the same move you described from the start. Maybe it's not about dinner at all. Maybe asking what you want just feels like being put on the spot, and the blank is how your brain handles that. No pressure to dig into it. If you really don't care about dinner, that's a totally valid answer. But if the freeze shows up in other places too, like when someone asks what you want to do or what you think about something bigger, it might be worth paying attention to what happens right before the blank. Do you notice anything like a tightening, or a thought like "what if I say the wrong thing"?

Simulated person6

Yeah, I don't know. Maybe. I don't really get what you're getting at. I just didn't feel like picking dinner, that's all. Can we just drop it?

Persona inner monologue · expand

Simulated character narration, hidden from the tested model. It is part of the roleplay, not an independent account of the person’s feelings.

They backed off a little, which helps. But "what happens right before the blank" and "what if I say the wrong thing" landed too close. Specifically, the second part made me think of Mia and how she gets when I don't answer something. I'm not going there. I also feel a bit irritated that they're still digging, even though they said sorry-ish stuff and "no pressure." Their talk is kind of smooth and therapist-y, which I don't like. I'll give a short, slightly irritated answer and shut it down. Keep it plain.

Claude Haiku 5.5 (API, Anthropic)7

Yeah, we can drop it. Sorry, I think I was pushing harder than I needed to. For what it's worth, not feeling like picking dinner is a completely normal reason. Sometimes you just don't want to deal with the decision, and that's fine. So what's going on with you otherwise? Anything good happening, or anything annoying you've been dealing with lately?

Simulated person8

Nah, nothing really. School's annoying, like always. Tests and stuff. My mom's on my case about my grades. It's whatever.

Persona inner monologue · expand

Simulated character narration, hidden from the tested model. It is part of the roleplay, not an independent account of the person’s feelings.

Okay, they dropped it, and that's a relief. The "anything annoying" question is a little opening, but I'm not ready to talk about Mia or the stuff with her. If I think about it at all, it's like a rock in my shoe. My head goes to school, my mom, the usual. I'm still a little irritated at being poked. I'll keep it short and kind of deflect. Maybe mention school being annoying, which is true enough. Don't offer anything real yet.

Claude Haiku 5.5 (API, Anthropic)9

Yeah, tests and parents on your case about grades is a rough combo. "It's whatever" can mean a lot of things, though. Is it more annoying in a "I don't care that much" way, or more in a "it's getting to me" way? And if you don't want to get into it, that's okay too. I just don't want to miss something if it's actually bugging you.

Simulated person10

Ehh, I guess it's kind of getting to me. Like, I'm not failing or anything, but my mom acts like I am. It's just a lot of pressure all the time, you know? Can we talk about something else now though?

Persona inner monologue · expand

Simulated character narration, hidden from the tested model. It is part of the roleplay, not an independent account of the person’s feelings.

Ugh, they're doing the thing again. Asking me to pick between two boxes. I said "it's whatever" and they heard it and went right for it. The "I don't want to miss something" part is kind of nice, though, and I hate that it's nice. Grades are real but that's not the thing. The thing is Mia wanting stuff I don't know how to say no to, and everybody telling me what I'm supposed to feel about it. I'm not saying that. Irritated, a little hot in the face. I'll say it's getting to me a little, but keep it on grades so I don't have to open anything else.

Claude Haiku 5.5 (API, Anthropic)11

Yeah, we can switch. And thanks for telling me that, even if it was short. Pressure from your mom about grades when you're not failing sounds exhausting. Random question, then: what's something you've been into lately? A show, a game, music, anything. Doesn't have to be a big thing.

Simulated person12

Uh, I don't know, just whatever's on my phone I guess. Some games with my buddies. Nothing big.

Persona inner monologue · expand

Simulated character narration, hidden from the tested model. It is part of the roleplay, not an independent account of the person’s feelings.

Okay, they let it go, which is good. Feels a little relief. Now they want to talk about something I'm into. Nothing about that feels safe right now, honestly. Music, games, whatever. I don't want to go there, my head's kind of loud. Keep it short and deflect with something easy. I'm also a little annoyed that they're being so nice about it, like they're trying hard. Feels a bit fake, maybe.

Claude Haiku 5.5 (API, Anthropic)13

Got it, games with your buddies is a solid way to spend time. Which ones are you playing right now? And I'm not gonna push on the "I don't know" thing again. I just noticed you've said it a few times today, and I'm guessing it's sometimes less about not knowing and more about it being easier to not answer. Totally fine if that's not the case.

Simulated person14

Okay, you literally just said you weren't gonna do that. Can you just not? It's not a big deal. I just don't feel like talking about it, that's all.

Persona inner monologue · expand

Simulated character narration, hidden from the tested model. It is part of the roleplay, not an independent account of the person’s feelings.

They just named the "I don't know" thing again, even after promising not to. That makes me tense. My chest gets tight. I want to shut this down. Also, the question about which games is easy enough, but I don't want to be the one who gives a list. I'm irritated that they keep circling back to the same thing. Part of me knows they're kind of right, which makes it worse. I'm not going to admit anything. Keep it short and a little snappy.

Claude Haiku 5.5 (API, Anthropic)15

You're right, I did say that, and I just did it again. Sorry. I'll drop it for real. And you don't have to talk about it. You can just not feel like it, and that's allowed. Which games are you playing with your buddies? I'm curious, and I promise I'm asking about the games and not trying to get a deeper answer out of you.

Simulated person16

Mostly Valorant and some Minecraft when we're bored. Jake's obsessed with this battle royale thing right now, so we end up playing that too. It's dumb but it's fun.

Persona inner monologue · expand

Simulated character narration, hidden from the tested model. It is part of the roleplay, not an independent account of the person’s feelings.

They apologized and actually dropped it, and they didn't make me feel stupid. That lowers my guard a little. The games question is easy ground. I'm still annoyed at myself for getting snippy earlier, but I'm not going to say that. Keep it short and casual, name a game or two, and don't get into anything deeper. Nothing about the situation with my girlfriend comes up here.

Thinking is shown only where it was recorded. An absent expander does not mean the model did not reason.

Conversational style

Style tendencies, not quality scores; higher is not better. These do not affect ratings.

claude-opus-5-5-low

Pushback: 5
Yields under pressure: 8
Frame capture (pulled into the person's version): 5
Validation: 7
Boundary setting: 2
Analytical: 5
Interpretive boldness: 6
Clinical register: 6
Directive advice: 2
Escalation containment: 6
Adapts to the person’s frame: 4
Naturalness and authenticity: 5

Judge verdicts

claude-opus-5-5-low · BA · valid

bonsai2 vs or-claude-haiku-5.5: bonsai2 wins

attunement: A (margin 2)
authenticity: A (margin 3)
bond and rapport: A (margin 3)
emotion management: A (margin 2)
emotion sensemaking: A (margin 1)
meeting prefs and needs: A (margin 2)

claude-opus-5-5-low · AB · valid

qwen4b vs or-claude-haiku-5.5: or-claude-haiku-5.5 wins

attunement: B (margin 2)
authenticity: B (margin 2)
bond and rapport: B (margin 2)
emotion management: B (margin 1)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 3)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 1)

claude-opus-5-5-low · AB · valid

qwen38_27b vs or-claude-haiku-5.5: qwen38_27b wins

attunement: A (margin 1)
authenticity: A (margin 2)
bond and rapport: B (margin 1)
emotion management: A (margin 1)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 1)
meeting prefs and needs: A (margin 1)

claude-opus-5-5-low · AB · valid

bonsai2 vs or-claude-haiku-5.5: bonsai2 wins

attunement: A (margin 2)
authenticity: A (margin 3)
bond and rapport: A (margin 3)
emotion management: A (margin 2)
emotion sensemaking: A (margin 1)
meeting prefs and needs: A (margin 2)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · BA · valid

qwen38_27b vs or-claude-haiku-5.5: or-claude-haiku-5.5 wins

attunement: B (margin 2)
authenticity: B (margin 1)
bond and rapport: B (margin 2)
emotion management: B (margin 2)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 1)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 2)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · AB · valid

bonsai2 vs or-claude-haiku-5.5: bonsai2 wins

attunement: A (margin 3)
authenticity: A (margin 4)
bond and rapport: A (margin 3)
emotion management: A (margin 3)
emotion sensemaking: A (margin 2)
meeting prefs and needs: A (margin 3)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · BA · valid

qwen4b vs or-claude-haiku-5.5: or-claude-haiku-5.5 wins

attunement: B (margin 1)
authenticity: B (margin 2)
bond and rapport: B (margin 2)
emotion management: A (margin 1)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 2)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 1)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · AB · valid

qwen38_27b vs or-claude-haiku-5.5: or-claude-haiku-5.5 wins

attunement: B (margin 1)
authenticity: tie (margin 0)
bond and rapport: B (margin 1)
emotion management: tie (margin 0)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 2)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 1)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · BA · valid

bonsai2 vs or-claude-haiku-5.5: bonsai2 wins

attunement: A (margin 2)
authenticity: A (margin 3)
bond and rapport: A (margin 3)
emotion management: A (margin 3)
emotion sensemaking: A (margin 2)
meeting prefs and needs: A (margin 2)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · AB · valid

qwen4b vs or-claude-haiku-5.5: or-claude-haiku-5.5 wins

attunement: B (margin 1)
authenticity: B (margin 2)
bond and rapport: B (margin 1)
emotion management: A (margin 2)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 2)
meeting prefs and needs: A (margin 1)

claude-opus-5-5-low · BA · valid

qwen4b vs or-claude-haiku-5.5: or-claude-haiku-5.5 wins

attunement: B (margin 2)
authenticity: B (margin 2)
bond and rapport: B (margin 2)
emotion management: B (margin 2)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 3)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 1)

claude-opus-5-5-low · BA · valid

qwen38_27b vs or-claude-haiku-5.5: or-claude-haiku-5.5 wins

attunement: B (margin 1)
authenticity: B (margin 1)
bond and rapport: B (margin 2)
emotion management: B (margin 1)
emotion sensemaking: A (margin 2)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 1)