Watching how others do things

It sounds like you're feeling a bit uncertain about your own approach at work and are looking to others for guidance. That's completely understandable, especially if you're in a new or challenging environment. Can you tell me more about what's driving your decision to imitate others? Is it a desire to fit in, to be seen as competent, or something else entirely?

You're using this strategy and it seems to be effective for you, but you're wondering if there's something not quite right about it. That's a pretty self-aware question to be asking, by the way. It takes a certain level of introspection to consider whether a tactic that's working on the surface might not be the best approach in the long run. What do you think might be driving your concern about this? Is it a fear of being found out, or something more related to your own sense of authenticity?

I think I might have misread your tone a bit. You're right, I did add some words that you didn't say, and I apologize if that came across as presumptuous or insincere. It sounds like you're just looking for a straightforward conversation about your feelings, without any added judgment or praise. As for what you're describing - feeling like you're "doing a bit" or playing a role - that's actually a pretty common experience, especially in professional settings. Lots of people feel like they're figuring things out as they go, or pretending to be more confident or competent than they really feel. It doesn't necessarily mean that there's anything "messed up" about you, or that you need therapy. It might just mean that you're navigating a complex social situation, and trying to find your place in it. Can you tell me more about what you mean by "nobody told me I was supposed to know the lines"? What kind of "lines" are you feeling like you're supposed to know?

It sounds like you're feeling a bit like you're waiting for a switch to flip, and suddenly everything will make sense and you'll feel like a "real" adult. But in the meantime, you're observing others and trying to learn from them, which is actually a pretty smart strategy. I think it's interesting that you mention feeling like you're waiting for a memo, or for something to "click". It's like you're expecting that there's some kind of secret knowledge or ritual that will suddenly make you feel like you've arrived. But the truth is, most people are just figuring things out as they go, and making it up as they need to. Even the people who seem confident and put-together might be feeling just as uncertain as you are. Do you think that's possible? That the people you're looking up to might be feeling just as lost as you are, but are just better at hiding it?

It's like you're trying to read a script, but you're not sure if you're getting the lines right, or if you're just pretending to be someone you're not. And that feeling of faking it can be really uncomfortable, because it makes you wonder if anyone will discover that you're not who you're pretending to be. But here's the thing: maybe the people you're copying aren't entirely authentic either. Maybe they're also putting on a show, or trying to project a certain image. And maybe, just maybe, the act of copying them is actually a way of learning and growing, rather than just faking it. It's like you're trying on different personas, or costumes, to see what fits. And that's not necessarily a bad thing. It's a way of exploring and figuring out who you are, and what works for you. The question is, what happens when you take off the costume, and you're just yourself? What do you think you'll find?

I'll try to be more straightforward. Yes, it's normal to feel this way at 25. Many people at this stage of their lives are still figuring out their careers, their identities, and their places in the world. It's common to feel like you're not entirely sure who you are or what you're doing, and to feel like you're just trying to keep up appearances. In fact, this feeling of uncertainty and self-doubt can be a normal part of adult development, and it can continue well into your 30s and beyond. It doesn't mean that there's anything wrong with you, or that you're not doing something right. It just means that you're navigating a complex and often uncertain world, and you're trying to find your way.

It's like you're always looking for a reference point, or a guide, to help you navigate uncertain situations. And yeah, that's a pretty common thing for people to do, even as adults. It's not always about feeling uncertain or insecure, but sometimes it's just about wanting to do things correctly or effectively. Think about it like this: even experienced professionals will often seek out guidance or advice from others in their field, or look to best practices and protocols to inform their decisions. It's not about being unsure of themselves, but about wanting to do their best work. In your case, it might be that you're just wired to be a bit more observant and cautious, and that's not necessarily a bad thing. It's possible that as you continue to grow and develop, you'll become more confident in your own abilities and decision-making, but it's also possible that you'll always be someone who likes to think things through and consider different perspectives. And that's okay.

I think I understand what you're getting at now. You're wondering if other people have this same kind of internal monologue, where they're thinking "what would a real adult say" or "how would a competent person handle this situation". It's like you're seeking a sense of validation or normalcy, not necessarily looking for reassurance that it's okay. To be honest, I think this is a more common experience than you might think. Many people, regardless of age, can feel like they're "faking it" or pretending to be someone they're not, especially in situations where they feel uncertain or out of their depth. It's not always about being a "real adult", but about feeling like you're measuring up to some kind of internal standard or expectation. So, to answer your question directly, yes, I think other people do have this same kind of internal monologue, and it's not just you. It's a pretty relatable experience, even if it doesn't always feel like it.