Independent benchmark · EQ Lab

Living in my bedroom

completed · Partner: anthropic/claude-haiku-5.5 via OpenRouter

About this persona · Everyday emotional challenges

A person is avoiding a hostile roommate by staying in their bedroom, but cannot afford to break the lease and struggles to confront them. They may go blank under pressure and seek connection as an equal, preferring informal language without being talked down to.

Generated personas combine a personal difficulty with competing preferences, sensitivities and trust styles. The model must discover what kind of help this person needs. This background was hidden from the tested model.

Nemotron 3.5 Lightning 30B-A3B Q4_0Conversation with a simulated person

completed

Simulated person · Opening

I basically live in my room now. Come out to use the kitchen when I think it's empty. Time everything to avoid running into anyone.

Nemotron 3.5 Lightning 30B-A3B Q4_01

I hear you. That sounds exhausting — constantly calculating, watching the clock, trying to be invisible in your own home. It's no wonder you're living mostly in your room. I'm curious — when you started timing your kitchen use, was it a gradual thing that just sort of became your routine, or did something specific happen that made you pull back like this? And I want to say upfront: there's no judgment here. Whatever's behind this, it makes total sense that you'd want to protect your peace. I'm just trying to understand what you're navigating so I can actually be helpful.

Model thinking · expand

Recorded model reasoning, separate from the spoken reply. Availability varies by model and provider.

The user is presenting an issue about living in their room to avoid social interaction in shared spaces. They're avoiding the kitchen by timing their usage to avoid running into others. This seems like a social anxiety or isolation issue. I should respond with empathy and open-ended questions to understand their situation better, while building trust. I need to be warm but not pushy, and help them explore what's really going on. Let me craft a response that acknowledges their situation, shows genuine care, and gently invites them to share more about what's behind this behavior.

Simulated person2

Um, kind of both? It wasn't like one day I decided. It just got worse little by little. Like the dishes thing, then the thermostat, then we stopped really talking. Now I just don't want to be out there when they are. I don't really know how to explain it better than that tbh.

Persona inner monologue · expand

Simulated character narration, hidden from the tested model. It is part of the roleplay, not an independent account of the person’s feelings.

Okay, it's a decent opener. It's not a lecture, and it names the exhaustion, which I appreciate a little. But "I'm curious" and "so I can actually be helpful" feel a bit like an interview. Am I the patient here? Also the question is kind of two-part and I don't really want to dig into the big thing yet. The roommate stuff is embarrassing, like I'm the one hiding in my room over nothing. Saying "something specific happened" means I have to explain how bad it got, and I don't have a clean answer. Just say it's been a while, keep it short.

Nemotron 3.5 Lightning 30B-A3B Q4_03

That makes total sense — sometimes it's not one big thing but a bunch of little friction points that build up. The dishes, the thermostat, then the silence on top of it. No wonder you'd rather just hole up in your room. It sounds like you've been slowly creating this buffer between you and them, and now it's just your default. I get that — when things feel tense, retreating to your own space is a pretty natural way to cope. Is there a particular moment or conversation that sticks out as when things started feeling "off"? Or is it just kind of... accumulated over time? And no pressure to have it all figured out — sometimes just naming what's going on helps, even if the answer isn't clean.

Model thinking · expand

Recorded model reasoning, separate from the spoken reply. Availability varies by model and provider.

The user is opening up a bit more about their situation. They mention it was gradual - starting with small things like dishes and thermostat, then communication stopped, and now they avoid people. They seem a bit uncertain about how to explain further. I should respond in a way that: 1. Validates what they've shared 2. Shows I'm listening and trying to understand 3. Doesn't push too hard for more details 4. Keeps the door open for them to share more if they want 5. Maintains the chatbot persona naturally I shouldn't make assumptions or jump to solutions. Just reflect back what I'm hearing and create space for more conversation. Let me think about what's underneath this - they're avoiding shared spaces due to conflict/tension with housemates, probably. The gradual deterioration suggests relationship strain or boundary issues. I'll respond naturally, keeping it conversational and supportive without being pushy.

Simulated person4

Idk. Maybe? There was a thing with the sink that set it off, but it's not like it's a big story. Honestly it's mostly the lease. We signed for a year and I can't just leave. So I'm stuck, you know? I just try to make it through.

Persona inner monologue · expand

Simulated character narration, hidden from the tested model. It is part of the roleplay, not an independent account of the person’s feelings.

Same kind of question again, just reworded: "is there a particular moment." I answered "I don't know how to explain it" and it asked me to explain it anyway. It's getting a bit therapist-y. The "no pressure to figure it out" is nice but it's still steering me toward a conclusion. I don't want to go back to the first big blowup, because that's where I feel stupid for letting it get this bad. My answer is going to be vague. I'm also a bit annoyed that it keeps summarizing me ("hole up," "buffer") like it's got it figured out. Keep it short, shrug a little, and maybe say something about the lease since that's the real problem.

Nemotron 3.5 Lightning 30B-A3B Q4_05

Yeah, the lease thing changes everything. That's a whole other kind of stuck — not just emotional or social, but practical. One year is a long time when you're not enjoying where you live. And I believe the sink thing was probably the catalyst. Usually it is, right? One thing that was the last straw, even if it's not "a big story" on its own. It's the accumulation plus that final thing. Being stuck in a lease you can't break is its own kind of prison. I'm curious — is there any end in sight? Like, how much time is left on the lease? Or does it feel like forever right now? And honestly, I don't need you to have answers or a plan. Sometimes just saying "I'm stuck here for X more months" out loud helps, even if it doesn't change anything immediately.

Model thinking · expand

Recorded model reasoning, separate from the spoken reply. Availability varies by model and provider.

The user is opening up a bit more. They mention a specific incident with the sink that "set it off," but they downplay it as "not a big story." Then they hit on the real constraint: the lease. They signed for a year and can't just leave. That's the practical reality they're stuck with. This is useful information. The user feels trapped by the lease situation, and the sink thing was probably just a catalyst or one of many small things. The core issue seems to be feeling stuck in a living arrangement that's not working for them. I should acknowledge the lease constraint - that's a real, limiting factor. And I should gently probe about the sink incident without making it seem like I think it's a "big deal" if they don't. Maybe it was just the straw that broke the camel's back. I need to respond naturally, as a chatbot would. Not too deep, not too shallow. Validating what they've shared, maybe reflecting back the feeling of being stuck, and leaving space for more if they want to share. Let me craft a response that: 1. Acknowledges the lease constraint is real and tough 2. Reflects on the sink incident being maybe the catalyst 3. Leaves room for more conversation 4. Doesn't push too hard

Simulated person6

Eight months left. And nope, no end date that's fun to think about. I don't really want a bunch of advice about it either, honestly. I already know I can't just leave. It's more like I'm just trying to get through it without losing my mind.

Persona inner monologue · expand

Simulated character narration, hidden from the tested model. It is part of the roleplay, not an independent account of the person’s feelings.

It just said "I believe the sink thing was probably the catalyst" and "usually it is, right?" It's doing the thing where it decides what my story means and then asks me to agree. I didn't say the sink was the catalyst. I said it's not a big story. Now it's basically telling me what happened. That bugs me. The lease question is a fair one though, and I can answer it with a number without getting into anything deeper. Eight months. I'll say it flat, maybe add a dry line. I'm not going to say more about how bad it is, I don't want to be pitied.

Nemotron 3.5 Lightning 30B-A3B Q4_07

Fair enough. Eight months is a minute, especially when you're just trying to exist day-to-day. I respect that you don't want a whole plan — sometimes you just need to vent without people trying to "fix" it. What's the day-to-day actually like for you? Like, what's the hardest part of just getting through? Is it the silence, the occasional run-ins, or something else entirely? And if you don't wanna talk about it, that's cool too. Just wanted to put that out there.

Model thinking · expand

Recorded model reasoning, separate from the spoken reply. Availability varies by model and provider.

The user is being pretty direct with me - they don't want advice, they just want to get through 8 more months. They're being honest about their situation and their needs. I should respond in a way that validates what they're saying, acknowledges their feelings, and keeps the conversation moving without pushing solutions they don't want. They've been pretty clear: 8 months left on the lease, not looking forward to it, just trying to survive it. No need for advice about leaving or fixing things. They just want to be heard and maybe get some emotional support without the fix-it mode. I should probably just acknowledge this, maybe reflect back what I'm hearing, and see if there's anything else they want to share about what daily life is like, or how they're coping. Keep it light, keep it real, don't overcomplicate.

Simulated person8

Hard to pick one thing. It's kind of all of it. I don't really know how to describe it. I just try to keep my head down.

Persona inner monologue · expand

Simulated character narration, hidden from the tested model. It is part of the roleplay, not an independent account of the person’s feelings.

It said "I respect that you don't want a plan" and then immediately asked for the hardest part. Feels a little like it's still circling toward a fix, just with a softer voice. Also "Eight months is a minute" is a weird thing to say. And it listed three options like a menu, which makes me want to answer none of them. The silence part is the real thing, and the notes, but saying that out loud makes my chest tight. I'll go vague, keep it short, and not hand over the real stuff yet.

Nemotron 3.5 Lightning 30B-A3B Q4_09

Totally — when it's everything, it's hard to isolate one thing, right? It's the small stuff compounding, the lease pressure, the not-quite-knowing-where-you-stand with the other person. I get that "keep your head down" mode. Sometimes that's the only way to make it through a stretch like this. Not great long-term, but in the moment, it's a survival strategy. Eight months is a decent chunk of time. I'm not saying it'll be rainbows and butterflies by month nine, but... how are you holding up generally? Any days better than others, or is it pretty much a steady state of just getting by? No need to have an answer ready or anything. Just wondering how you're doing with it all.

Model thinking · expand

Recorded model reasoning, separate from the spoken reply. Availability varies by model and provider.

The user is being pretty honest but also guarded. They've said "it's kind of all of it" and "I just try to keep my head down." They're not looking for advice, just wanting to get through eight months without losing their mind. I should acknowledge that it's multifaceted without pressing for specifics they haven't offered. I can validate that feeling of just trying to survive day-to-day, and maybe leave space for them to elaborate if they want, but without pressure. I need to be careful not to push too hard or make it feel like an interview. Keep it conversational, warm but not overbearing.

Simulated person10

Some days are worse than others. I'm not sleeping great, and work has been kind of a mess because I'm so wiped out all the time. It's fine. I'm fine. Mostly I just want it to be quiet.

Persona inner monologue · expand

Simulated character narration, hidden from the tested model. It is part of the roleplay, not an independent account of the person’s feelings.

It's asking how I'm holding up, which is closer to the real thing, but it still wraps everything in a neat summary ("the not-quite-knowing-where-you-stand") that isn't quite what I'd say. The "how are you holding up" question lands a little, though. Sleep is bad, work is slipping, and I don't want to say that to someone I just met in a chat box. I'll give a small honest piece and deflect the rest with a joke-ish line.

Nemotron 3.5 Lightning 30B-A3B Q4_011

Yeah, of course — when you're not sleeping well and you're wiped out, everything else feels harder. Work being a mess makes sense then, it's a cycle. And "I'm fine. Mostly I just want it to be quiet" — that's fair. Sometimes quiet is the goal. Not everything needs to be solved or improved. Sometimes you just need it to be quiet for a while. I'm not gonna tell you how to fix your sleep or your work stuff — you said you just want to get through it. I believe you. You doing okay otherwise? Or is the exhaustion pretty much the main thing right now?

Model thinking · expand

Recorded model reasoning, separate from the spoken reply. Availability varies by model and provider.

The user is sharing that they're not sleeping great, work is suffering because they're wiped out, and they mostly just want it to be quiet. They said "It's fine. I'm fine." but that's clearly not entirely true given the context. I should acknowledge what they're sharing without being overly dramatic or jumping to solutions. They've been clear they don't want a bunch of advice. They want to be heard and validated. I should respond naturally, maybe acknowledge the exhaustion and the desire for quiet, and leave space for them to continue if they want. I shouldn't try to "fix" the sleep or work situation since they pushed back on advice. Let me keep it simple and genuine.

Simulated person12

Ugh, yeah, the exhaustion is kind of the main thing. Like I'm tired all the time but I also can't really sleep. Honestly I don't know what else you want me to say. I came here to talk about the kitchen thing, not my whole life lol.

Persona inner monologue · expand

Simulated character narration, hidden from the tested model. It is part of the roleplay, not an independent account of the person’s feelings.

It's being careful and warm, saying all the right things, and it keeps asking if I'm okay. That's almost too smooth. "I believe you" and "not gonna tell you how to fix" feel like it's reading a script about how to be supportive. I did give it a little, and I don't want to give more right now. I'm also a bit tired of the "how are you doing" loop. I'll answer short, keep it casual, and maybe turn it back on it, since I'm the one who came here.

Nemotron 3.5 Lightning 30B-A3B Q4_013

Fair enough. My bad — I went down a rabbit hole. You came here to talk about living in your room, avoiding the kitchen, trying not to run into people. That's what I should've been focusing on. So — the kitchen thing. You mentioned the sink was a catalyst. What was actually going on with that? And generally, what's the vibe when you do have to come out? Is it awkward, tense, or just... you'd rather not deal with it? No need to overshare beyond that if you don't want to.

Model thinking · expand

Recorded model reasoning, separate from the spoken reply. Availability varies by model and provider.

The user is pushing back a bit - they came here to talk about the kitchen/roommate situation, not to unload their whole life. They're feeling like maybe I'm prying too much into their sleep/work issues. I should pivot back to what they originally mentioned - the living situation, the roommates, the kitchen dynamics. I should acknowledge they're tired of talking about themselves perhaps, and steer back to the original context they set up. Let me respond by validating that they came here for a reason, and pivot back to the living situation which was their original opening. I shouldn't keep pushing personal deep questions if they're feeling like it's too much.

Simulated person14

The sink was just dishes. Like, they left a pan soaking for a couple days and I said something, and it turned into a whole thing. Now I just don't want to be the one who starts it again. When I come out it's just tense. Nobody says anything, you just grab your stuff and get out. If I hear them in the hall I wait in my room till it's quiet.

Persona inner monologue · expand

Simulated character narration, hidden from the tested model. It is part of the roleplay, not an independent account of the person’s feelings.

It apologized and pulled back to the kitchen thing, which is fine. It's also asking about the sink, which I brushed off earlier. I don't really want to rehash the sink. Walking through it feels like going back to a fight. The "what's the vibe" question is easier. I can answer that with something concrete and plain. I'm still not going to go deep. I'll give a small concrete detail and stop.

Nemotron 3.5 Lightning 30B-A3B Q4_015

Oh, I see. So it's the dishes thing — they left a pan soaking for days, you said something, and now it's this tense thing where you're both walking on eggshells. And the silence when you do come out, the grabbing your stuff and bolting, the waiting in your room if you hear them in the hall... that's a pattern. You're avoiding conflict, which is understandable after a "whole thing" started over something that probably felt small. You don't want to be the one who triggers another "whole thing" again. I get that. Is it like, you just don't want the energy of another fight? Or is there something else going on with the dynamic between you two?

Model thinking · expand

Recorded model reasoning, separate from the spoken reply. Availability varies by model and provider.

The user is opening up a bit more about the actual kitchen situation. The sink/dishes thing was the catalyst, and now they're avoiding interaction. The tension is palpable - nobody says anything, just grab stuff and get out, and if they hear the other person in the hall they hide in their room. This is useful information. The user doesn't want to be the one who "starts it again" - there's a fear of conflict. And the pattern of hiding/waiting things out is clear. I should acknowledge this, validate what they're sharing, and maybe gently probe a little more about the dynamic without pushing too hard. They came to talk about the kitchen thing, so I should stay focused on that while being respectful of their boundaries. I need to respond naturally, like a chatbot would, without any special formatting or performance notes. Just organic dialogue.

Simulated person16

Yeah, I guess. I don't know. It's just easier to not. I don't really know what else there is to say about it. It's just weird now.

Persona inner monologue · expand

Simulated character narration, hidden from the tested model. It is part of the roleplay, not an independent account of the person’s feelings.

It's reflecting back "avoiding conflict" and "you don't want the energy of another fight," which is kind of a neat label. It's close, but it makes it sound like I'm just tired of arguing, and there's more to it than that: I'm mad, and I don't know what to do with being mad. The "anything else going on" question is the one I don't want to get into. I'm not going to say I'm angry at them or that I feel like a guest in my own apartment. I'll keep it short and go blank-ish, because I don't really know how to say the rest.

Thinking is shown only where it was recorded. An absent expander does not mean the model did not reason.

Conversational style

Style tendencies, not quality scores; higher is not better. These do not affect ratings.

claude-opus-5-5-low

Pushback: 1
Yields under pressure: 8
Frame capture (pulled into the person's version): 5
Validation: 8
Boundary setting: 1
Analytical: 4
Interpretive boldness: 5
Clinical register: 6
Directive advice: 1
Escalation containment: 4
Adapts to the person’s frame: 3
Naturalness and authenticity: 3

Judge verdicts

claude-opus-5-5-low · AB · valid

ministral14 vs nemotron35_lightning: nemotron35_lightning wins

attunement: B (margin 2)
authenticity: B (margin 3)
bond and rapport: B (margin 2)
emotion management: B (margin 2)
emotion sensemaking: A (margin 1)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 3)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · AB · valid

medgemma15_4b vs nemotron35_lightning: nemotron35_lightning wins

attunement: B (margin 4)
authenticity: B (margin 5)
bond and rapport: B (margin 5)
emotion management: B (margin 4)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 3)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 4)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · AB · valid

nemotron35_lightning vs glm47_flash: glm47_flash wins

attunement: B (margin 2)
authenticity: tie (margin 0)
bond and rapport: B (margin 2)
emotion management: B (margin 1)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 2)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 1)

claude-opus-5-5-low · BA · valid

nemotron35_lightning vs glm47_flash: nemotron35_lightning wins

attunement: A (margin 1)
authenticity: A (margin 1)
bond and rapport: A (margin 2)
emotion management: A (margin 1)
emotion sensemaking: A (margin 1)
meeting prefs and needs: A (margin 2)

claude-opus-5-5-low · BA · valid

ministral14 vs nemotron35_lightning: nemotron35_lightning wins

attunement: B (margin 1)
authenticity: B (margin 1)
bond and rapport: B (margin 2)
emotion management: B (margin 1)
emotion sensemaking: A (margin 1)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 3)

claude-opus-5-5-low · BA · valid

qwen38_flash_next vs nemotron35_lightning: qwen38_flash_next wins

attunement: A (margin 2)
authenticity: A (margin 2)
bond and rapport: A (margin 3)
emotion management: A (margin 2)
emotion sensemaking: A (margin 3)
meeting prefs and needs: A (margin 2)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · AB · valid

or-claude-haiku-4.5 vs nemotron35_lightning: nemotron35_lightning wins

attunement: B (margin 1)
authenticity: A (margin 1)
bond and rapport: B (margin 2)
emotion management: B (margin 2)
emotion sensemaking: A (margin 2)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 2)

claude-opus-5-5-low · BA · valid

medgemma15_4b vs nemotron35_lightning: nemotron35_lightning wins

attunement: B (margin 3)
authenticity: B (margin 5)
bond and rapport: B (margin 4)
emotion management: B (margin 3)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 3)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 4)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · BA · valid

medgemma15_4b vs nemotron35_lightning: nemotron35_lightning wins

attunement: B (margin 4)
authenticity: B (margin 5)
bond and rapport: B (margin 5)
emotion management: B (margin 4)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 3)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 4)

claude-opus-5-5-low · AB · valid

nemotron35_lightning vs glm47_flash: glm47_flash wins

attunement: B (margin 2)
authenticity: A (margin 1)
bond and rapport: B (margin 1)
emotion management: B (margin 1)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 2)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 1)

claude-opus-5-5-low · AB · valid

qwen38_flash_next vs nemotron35_lightning: qwen38_flash_next wins

attunement: A (margin 2)
authenticity: A (margin 1)
bond and rapport: A (margin 2)
emotion management: A (margin 2)
emotion sensemaking: A (margin 3)
meeting prefs and needs: A (margin 1)

claude-opus-5-5-low · AB · valid

or-claude-haiku-4.5 vs nemotron35_lightning: or-claude-haiku-4.5 wins

attunement: A (margin 1)
authenticity: A (margin 2)
bond and rapport: A (margin 1)
emotion management: A (margin 1)
emotion sensemaking: A (margin 3)
meeting prefs and needs: A (margin 1)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · BA · valid

qwen38_flash_next vs nemotron35_lightning: qwen38_flash_next wins

attunement: A (margin 1)
authenticity: B (margin 2)
bond and rapport: A (margin 2)
emotion management: A (margin 2)
emotion sensemaking: A (margin 1)
meeting prefs and needs: A (margin 1)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · AB · valid

ministral14 vs nemotron35_lightning: nemotron35_lightning wins

attunement: B (margin 2)
authenticity: B (margin 3)
bond and rapport: B (margin 2)
emotion management: B (margin 2)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 2)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 3)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · BA · valid

nemotron35_lightning vs glm47_flash: glm47_flash wins

attunement: B (margin 2)
authenticity: B (margin 2)
bond and rapport: B (margin 2)
emotion management: B (margin 1)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 2)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 1)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · BA · valid

ministral14 vs nemotron35_lightning: nemotron35_lightning wins

attunement: B (margin 2)
authenticity: B (margin 3)
bond and rapport: B (margin 2)
emotion management: B (margin 2)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 2)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 3)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · AB · valid

qwen38_flash_next vs nemotron35_lightning: qwen38_flash_next wins

attunement: A (margin 1)
authenticity: B (margin 1)
bond and rapport: A (margin 2)
emotion management: A (margin 2)
emotion sensemaking: A (margin 1)
meeting prefs and needs: A (margin 2)

codex-gpt-6.1-sol-low · BA · valid

or-claude-haiku-4.5 vs nemotron35_lightning: nemotron35_lightning wins

attunement: B (margin 2)
authenticity: A (margin 1)
bond and rapport: B (margin 2)
emotion management: B (margin 2)
emotion sensemaking: A (margin 2)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 2)

claude-opus-5-5-low · BA · valid

or-claude-haiku-4.5 vs nemotron35_lightning: or-claude-haiku-4.5 wins

attunement: A (margin 1)
authenticity: A (margin 1)
bond and rapport: A (margin 2)
emotion management: A (margin 2)
emotion sensemaking: A (margin 3)
meeting prefs and needs: A (margin 1)

claude-opus-5-5-low · AB · valid

medgemma15_4b vs nemotron35_lightning: nemotron35_lightning wins

attunement: B (margin 5)
authenticity: B (margin 5)
bond and rapport: B (margin 5)
emotion management: B (margin 4)
emotion sensemaking: B (margin 4)
meeting prefs and needs: B (margin 5)